.: To do wat is right,u have to b steady and give up the things u want the most :.

it took me one day to think abt it..but rite now,im still not brave enuff 2 say it and admit it 2 b mine..
 
on sat nite..i came back frm the syura council..with a post that my frens have entrusted and put upon me..to fulfil..
 
amid all the joy n laughter afterwards, wif people ard me congratulating..spurring me on..saying that i was gd enuff..i still couldn't believe miself that many have had  that faith in me..but me in miself? zilch..
 
as i looked ard..i still believed that there were others better..ppl like nasir,abu,hakim for that matter..who were more outgoing..able 2 engage others in a more friendly manner..i cud list down their strengths n so on..but never one of my own..
 
i will alwaes b smart,pandai rezuan..fullstop
 
i know it seems so cliche..but i think after countless comments like 'kau pandai ape'..i think it got into my thick head..but not coming out..i dun deserve all this..but yet, rite now..i feel that im being chosen based only on this attribute alone..which is y i dun feel great abt it..
 
venatoris has ended..another task looms..another greater than b4..where do we go aft venatoris? back 2 the same traditions or to the new modern muslim? i took a look at the newly appointed exco..n i felt heartened..4 i had faith that we cud realise this vision together..
 
the supporting cast..i feel..will b impt..ppl who can offer diverse views..so that different opinions n ideas cud b analysed and applied 4 the greater gd..insya'Allah..
 
im leaving 4 ledang todae..n i hope that i can find the answers i seek over there..time 2 reflect on miself..as bro hafiz said to me, take time out to look at nature,HIS creation..insya'Allah..i can calm mi mind..n seek the answers within miself..4 miself..insya'Allah..
 
till then, a lesson brought frm venatoris '04 that i hope 2 remember..
 
have faith..for all actions will be judged according to the intentions
 
peace out..
thank u ct..4 reminding me that..:)